ping (lil tate)

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by mygheenoe1, Sep 13, 2007.

  1. mygheenoe1

    mygheenoe1 Well-Known Member

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    If you have a car containing a Gator wide receiver, a Gator linebacker, and a Gator defensive back, who is driving the car?
    The cop.
     

  2. mygheenoe1

    mygheenoe1 Well-Known Member

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    Spurrier abruptly resigned from Florida

    Top ten reasons he resigned:

    10. He was just sick and tired of losing to Bobby Bowden in Tallahassee and wasn’t going to go through the pain again next season.
    9. He finally realized how ridiculous people look wearing blue and orange.
    8. He never liked the smell of "Hogtown".
    7. He was banned from all the golf courses in Florida for "Foul play".
    6. The coach in Tallahassee was so "good" it made him seem "evil".
    5. Not enough boogers to go around in Gainesville.
    4. There’s more to do in Washington D.C. than "cow tipping".
    3. His favorite colors are really garnet and gold.
    2. He’s hoping to have "power struggle"with President Bush.

    The #1 reason for resigning:

    Florida State hurt his feelings.

    Why did the Gator cross the road?

    Because it's easier than crossing the goal line?

    What is the difference between Cheerios and the Gators?
    Cheerios belong in a bowl!


    What is the difference between Steve Spurrier and God?

    God doesn't think he is Steve Spurrier.

    Why does spurrier wear the visor?
    To hide the circumcision marks.


    Why can't Steve Spurrier go on the internet?
    He can't put 3 w's together.
    How do you keep a Gator out of your front yard?
    Put a goal post up!
    How many Gators does it take to change a flat tire?
    Just one...unless it's a blowout, then they all show up!
    What do you get when you cross a Gator with a groundhog?
    Six more weeks of bad football.
    If you have a car containing a Gator wide receiver, a Gator linebacker, and a Gator defensive back, who is driving the car?
    The cop.
    What's the difference between a Gator and a bucket of manure?
    The bucket.
    What's the best thing to come out of Gainesville?
    I-75
    Why did the Gator grad get fired from the M&M factory?
    He was throwing away too many W's.
    How many Gators does it take to tackle Chris Weinke?
    Good question, no one knows.
    What did the UF graduate say to the FSU graduate?
    "You want fries with that?"
    Why is UF changing their mascot to the possum?
    Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.
    How do you sell out a UF home game?
    Invite the Florida State Seminoles!
    What should you do if you find three Gators buried up to their necks in cement?
    Get more cement!
    Good uses for a UF diploma:
    1. Toilet paper
    2. Proof of need for handicapped parking sticker
    3. Crying towel
    4. Proof of need for welfare
    How many Gators does it take to tackle Charlie Ward?
    I don't know, but it's more than eleven!
     
  3. mygheenoe1

    mygheenoe1 Well-Known Member

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    You might be a Gator if....


    * You ever cut your grass and found a car.
    * You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that aren't.
    * You think the stock market has a fence around it.
    * Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Moonlight Drive-in Theater.
    * You own four cars and no hubcaps.
    * Your idea of a great Christmas present is a gift certificate to the local
    bail bondsman
    * Your boat has not left the drive-way in 15 years.
    * Chiggers are included on your list of top 5 hygiene concerns.
    * You burn your yard rather than mow it.
    * Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a
    bath."
    * You refer to the time you won a free case of motor oil as "the day my
    ship came in."
    * You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen.
    * The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
    * You've ever raked leaves in your kitchen.
    * Your entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the
    Governor to spare a loved one.
    * Your grandmother has ever been asked to leave the bingo hall because of
    her language.
    * Someone asks, "Where's your bowling bag?" and you answer, "She's at home
    with the kids."
    * Birds are attracted to your beard.
    * Your wife's job requires her to wear an orange vest.
    * You were shooting pool when any of your kids were born.
    * You have the local taxidermist's number on speed dial.
    * You've ever hit a deer with your car...deliberatley.
    * You've ever given rat traps as gifts.
    * You clean your fingernails with a stick.
    * Your coffee table used to be a cable spool.
    * You keep a can of RAID on the kitchen table.
    * You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look
    nice.
    * Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
    * Your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
    * Every socket in your house breaks a fire code.
    * You've totaled every car you've ever owned.
    * There are more than five McDonald's bags currently in the floorboard of
    your car.
     
  4. mygheenoe1

    mygheenoe1 Well-Known Member

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    proper potty training!
    [​IMG]
     
  5. Lil_Tate

    Lil_Tate Well-Known Member

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    I have a few words for ya'. National Champs 2006

    Don't hate the playa', hate the game......

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RCgIZC8HNrU
     
  6. tom_in_orl

    tom_in_orl Founder of Microskiff, Member of the Gheenoe Army

    Where did you find my graduation photo????

    [​IMG]
     
  7. brew1891

    brew1891 Well-Known Member

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    i gots mad intardweb skillz!
     
  8. captnron

    captnron Guest

    I likes dis thread. :cool: