Kreepa,
YMMV= Your Mileage May Vary. Meaning what works for me may not work for you.
No offense was taken. I certainly understand your point of view. It must be a fine balance between "helping" a potential customer or someone that will recommend you and being left alone to get the work done you already have.
If I walk up to a place (again, any kind of place not just boat related), it's usually at the end of a work day specifically because I don't want to cause a problem. I'll look and see if they are running around, if they are I'll come back another day. The conversation usually starts with me saying I'm working on X and need to buy/source Y. Do you have any you would be willing to sell and if you don't who can you recommend that is reasonable. That is offering to buy stuff or just a quick recommendation. If the guy seems amiable I'll probably comment on his shop, one of the projects he is working on, or show some other interest in his work. If the response is "Thanks for that, have a nice day" well I can take a hint. If the guy starts talking, great. If we chat for a while, then I might offer the proverbial six pack as I get ready to leave or swing by again later and say hey thanks for chatting the other day have a six pack and have a nice evening. That is just being in appreciative.
I don't go in and say hey how would you do this since I'm not going to have you do it or buy anything from you. I will go and say I'm doing this project do you want to sell me materials. That gives you the chance to at least make some money and makes me like the customer service there. If I have a project at some time that is too big for me then that puts you on the short list. I'm also not going to pound on a ladder you are standing while you are painting a hull to ask you about a small sale.
And yes, I would have no problem talking to a chef about a great meal he makes and what his techniques are. Some people like sharing, some don't. I'll buy a beer for the chef that is nice to me, nothing wrong with that.
I expect we will never agree completely on this. That's okay. You obviously have a successful shop and your formula works for you. I tend to be loyal to to shops that will help me out. That works for me.
Now that we have completely hijacked this thread... :-[
Swamp